preparing for America

We were in the taxi this morning headed to one of our last play dates with Clara Anne and Chloe.

Emma (and everyone else in the family) has been battling some allergy/sinus issues. We're all stopped up and sneezy.

Emma got all puffy-eyed and then commented that she wants to sneeze, but can't. Boy, do I know how she feels!

She was quiet for a moment, rubbed her nose with the napkin I gave her and asked me:

"How do you say (snot) in English?"

The local word for "snot" is so concise and polite, that my kids have never actually learned the English word for it. Even when Josh and I speak to them on snotty subjects, we use the local word.

In our own ways, we're all getting ready to go back. Josh is handling scheduling and wrapping up details here. I'm in charge of packing, sorting, storing, and trying not to yell. The girls are dealing with the gradual disappearance of their favorite toys, books, blankets and other precious items.

Today, I saw just how much Emma is mentally preparing to go live in a country she really knows nothing about.

Snot has a way of clarifying things for you.

what I'll miss

It's hard to believe that July 5 is actually going to be here. Soon.

We've been able to see lots of friends and do lots of fun things in the days leading up to what will certainly be a mad packing rush.

Life changes so fast, that we go back to the States with the full realization that things will not be the same when it's time to return. Most people's lives don't stay the same, but it seems unusually true for people living overseas - the changes are big, and the changes are constant. Even if you don't know what will change, the fact that things will change constantly lingers in the backdrop of life.

These moments in our life, these moments in time as I know it will never come again; this is it. So with that in mind, I'm going to post some random thoughts on things I will miss about my life, as it is now.

I will miss friends. Local friends that have transcended the barrier of culture and have set up shop in the hallways of my heart. Local friends that are care enough to run to McDonalds in the dead of winter to celebrate a reading accomplishment. Friends that are comfortable enough to ask when they need something and don't make polite offers just to be polite. These friends in particular I will miss.

I will miss other friends that don't want anything from me except friendship. I've found that friends like that are so rare - most people want something: english lessons, help to immigrate to America, advice on how to help their kids study better, etc. The mom of this girl here wants nothing from me except to be my friend. I will forever love her for that. And my girls will forever love her daughter.
More friends. Friends that make me cry and wonder why God chose to be so good to my family. Friends that give my kids stability and confidence and acceptance and love. Friends that make a mama's heart nearly burst with emotions I never thought I'd feel til my kids were much older.

I will miss MY friends. Friends that have seen too much of my bad, some of my good, have heard me laugh, cry, snort, complain and watched me eat way too much...
...have prayed for me, have been there when things were falling apart, have been there when my life was great. Because of these two ladies, my life will never, ever be the same. There will be a huge space in my heart that will always be theirs.
I will miss the fact that our life is unusual. I will miss looking out our 10th floor window at traffic accidents. I will miss that fireworks always cause us to run to the window and watch. I will miss the things that seem very normal here, but in America will be very abnormal.
I will miss the unusual; the daily reminders that we are sojourners in a foreign land - the incense, the taxis, the asian architecture. Being here reminds me that my home is in heaven, my place is with Christ. I'm afraid I'll go back to America and be way too comfortable. I'm afraid that all the things that show me I don't fit in will be gone, and I'll go back to thinking America is where I belong.
I'll miss ladies night. I'll miss watching the body of Christ work in amazing ways. I'll miss watching healing and sharing and openness and generosity and love. I'll miss laughing.
Lots and lots of laughing.
In fact, so much laughing, it's hard to stay on topic sometimes.
But that's why we have the body, right?
I'll miss cheap manicures and making my girls feel special.
I'll miss someone making my lunch - and cleaning it up - for me, every weekday. I'll miss Chinese food. [Well, some of it, anyway...]
I'll miss this lady. She loves my kids almost as much as I do.
She certainly knows them almost as well as I do.
This lady - who was once just my house helper - has become my best local friend. We've both influenced each other in countless ways...as in, I used scissors to cut my pizza the other day because I've seen her do it so many times. =) I love her, faults and all. She loves me, faults and all. I can't imagine the last four years without her.
That's a lot of stuff to miss. I'm working on a list of things I won't miss, but that feels a little negative and condescending. If I can find a way to make it funny, I just might post it anyway. I look back at these four years and find myself amazed at who I've become. I've changed more than I thought was possible. My heart is different, my outlook, my faith, my theology, even parts of my personality are different. I look back at these four years and I see - overwhelmingly - God's goodness. More than I deserve, more than I can even recognize, more than I understand...God has been overwhelmingly good to us.

He is good. So very, very good.

If the last four years have been so good, even when things change it assures me that the upcoming years will be equally colored with His goodness.

It's things like that that won't change.

samantha turns 4

There's been a lot going on at our place recently, and honestly, Samantha's birthday felt a little last-minute to me. I was able to keep in perspective the fact that she's had a lot of special occasions recently - her 100 lessons reading party, her big come-home-from-the-hospital-party - so I didn't feel too guilty about it.

Instead of giving her a choice this year of her birthday cake, I chose for her - Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Her love of MMClubhouse intensified during her hospital stay, where she watched episodes of that show no less than 20 times. Even Josh can recite huge chunks of the show. =)

I signed her up for the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse cake without first considering how in the world I'd manage to do something like that...but in the end, I was satisfied with her cake result, especially in the light of the minimal amount of time I spent on it. Here's a sneak peek:

Samantha chose to celebrate her birthday by going to the Coconut Tree Playpark with our fam; it's always a good time at the Coconut Tree.
Josh helped Abby hang on for dear life during one swinging of the coconuts:
She was totally hooked from that point on:
It was hot in there and required several water breaks. Samantha especially gets overheated easily!
Once we got home from playing, she finally got to see her birthday cake:
She was excited! I was glad - and Emma was quick to point out my technical errors. (I put the door in the wrong place, had several parts missing from the slide, etc. That's scary that she can reconstruct the clubhouse in such detail!!)
For lunch, Samantha chose stir-fried cabbage, tofu, cashews and celery, and fried chicken strips. My kids love Chinese food!
It's a wonderful thing to listen to everyone sing to you!
Thanks to Aunt Kristen who planned months in advance, we had blowers...
...and party hats! And presents!
Our house helper prepared that night's Garlic Breadsticks in honor of Samantha:
Then after dinner, we went outside to play with the Giant Bubble Wand. Sorry there are no better pictures than this - abby was finding and eating trash on the ground, so the camera quickly got shelved!
We had a happy day celebrating sweet Samantha's life and spirit! At lunch as we all went around the table and reflected on special things about Samantha, I was struck by how different and unique she is. I know every child is unique, but sometimes taking a moment to reflect on it is amazing! I love so many things about her - her gentle spirit, her generosity, her humor, her love to pray, her go-with-the-flow attitude - and I'm so thankful she's here with us. We have been so blessed by her life!

Happy Birthday Samantha Kate!

our solution to the out-of-sorts

Remember back when Samantha was in the hospital and I was all weirded out about the noise level in my house? When it felt lonely even though there were plenty of people in it?

Well, one of those days, I was just sitting on the couch - yes, just sitting there, not doing one single thing - and I realized I HAD to get out of the house. I packed up Abby, told Emma to grab her shoes, and we headed out.

To paint our nails.

We are - at this writing, anyway - still a family of girls.

We chose a nail salon that's part of a bigger shopping mall. Two bucks lets my girls choose any Nail Art design they want. That's cheap entertainment.

Once Abby saw how big Emma looked up there, she hopped up on a stool and waited for her turn.
Emma chose hot pink with Hawaiian flowers:
Abby wasn't still enough for the hawaiian flowers, but she got the hot pink.
She could barely reach up over the glass counter.
We went right before lunch when the place was dead and all the counters were open and waiting for customers. It's such a great deal and gave us something to do. To take our minds off how much we missed Mantha.
And it gave Emma some extra incentive to stop biting her nails. Again.
I took Samantha a few days after she returned, and she chose glittery blue with the same flowers.

We're a family of girls. No way around it.

recovery and other items

I was sorting through my pictures the other day - a job I've been needing to do for a while - and I came across this picture that was taken the day before we crashed the hospital in BJ. Everyone was playing, except for Samantha who had no energy and no interest at all in moving. No wonder, since there were all sorts of stomach contents emptying into her insides, but anyway...

This was when I still thought she just had a bug, or ate something weird. I had the camera out taking pictures of Abby climbing in and out of a box, so I considerately snapped one of her feeling miserable. I'm a great mom, huh?

Then - get this - I said, "Can't you even give me a little smile?" I think I just won an award for Loser Mom.
Samantha has now been home from the hospital almost a week and seems to be doing well. She's started gaining back some weight, which has done some good for her skinny frame. She's loved having her sisters around to play with, and gradually she has stopped complaining of stomach pain. I think all in all, things are looking up.

Emma and Abby and I had a great time planning a welcome home party for Samantha, and drove all over town looking for the perfect balloons. (I know the balloons you're seeing in that picture don't likely meet your criteria of "perfect"...but our standards have relaxed a bit, considering what we have to work with!)

When Samantha came home and crashed on the bed to rest, Emma snuggled right up next to her and offered to read her a stack of books. I loved watching them spend time together and enjoy each other's company.
We have a little less than four weeks left here in our house, and so we are starting to feel the crunch of packing, sorting, and purging. There are still lots of things to tie up, but for now, we're happy to report that the family is back together and doing well.

Over and out -

Eggrollmama