hotel life

Well, Im sort of losing my appetite for writing about my vacation, even though there's a whole big story about this carnival thing that emma went to, with lots of new pictures. But I keep feeling guilty because I have NEW stuff to write about, I don't want to rehash old stuff. But the truth is, these pictures of samantha that I took in our hotel room are just TOO cute to leave sitting the draft black hole.

So there they are. Cheers to samantha, who by the way now crawls at moderate to high speed all through the house, deftly navigating her way up and down the step in our home. Whenever she hears emma laughing at some unseen location, she kicks it in high gear and belts out a little shriek to let emma know she is coming.

Her favorite pasttime, as I mentioned before, is pulling all the books off the shelf, though that just barely edges out "crawling around chasing emma on the floor" for first prize. She has officially mastered "more" in sign language, and is really good at waving "hi" and "bye" to people when instructed, and sometimes, just whenever she feels like it.

All my grandest efforts - and they truly feel grand, I must say - seem to leave me a little more confused than ever about exactly what is making my child's skin so nasty and eczematous (yes, that is a word). I've now gone over a week without chocolate or coke, my two previous closest companions, and almost a week with no dairy - cheese, butter, cream, milk or anything containing those ingredients. We have made our first batch of free-of-this, free-of-that laundry soap, but so far, that doesn't seem to have helped much either. She's such an enigma, that little gal. But, at least she's cute, huh?

adventures in paradise

or, otherwise known as "a day without children."

yes, that's right...one of our days in thailand, we were able to leave the girls in childcare without any meetings or anything to go to except hang out with our team. So, our first order of business was to sit around and chat. And eat oreos. Double stuff oreos. With coke.

Then, we decided to go to hard rock cafe for lunch. what beats hard rock? not much. plus, my dad sort of collects (or maybe I collect for him?) hard rock shirts, and even though I have been to this place many times, I had yet to get him a shirt. So we went to hard rock for lunch. I had fajitas and josh had ribs. And we shared a huge plate of nice fat cheesy nachos. And we took a picture. then, after a leisurely walk back, stopping at starbucks for a lovely raspberry frappachino that you ABSOLUTELY CANNOT BUY IN THE STATES but can buy in Thailand no matter what those crazy US baristas will tell you...we went back to our hotel and rented jet skis.

Jet skis seem to go so slow when you're watching them from the beach. But when you're hanging on to Mr. Eggroll for dear life as you rocket over the top of small waves, it doesn't feel like you're going so slowly anymore. In fact, I think most of the ride I was screaming. Most of them were happy, oh-this-is-real-fun-type screams. I think a few of them might of been screams of fear, though. Just don't tell josh. I told him I wasn't scared. :)

But then, when our time was almost up, Josh had the bizarre idea to make me try to drive the jet ski.

hmmmm.

So we go back to shore to trade places, and here's a rundown of the brief 60 seconds that I was piloting the jet ski.

Get on the jet ski...

manuever with great fear to shift my weight to accomodate josh hopping on behind me. Nearly crash.

Josh is on. Push the red button to go, but the jet ski guy wasn't out of the way. Knock him in the head with back of jet ski.

Get tangled up in boat anchor that is parked near jet ski. Jet ski owner guy falls into rope.

Josh is afraid jet ski will be taken down by boat anchor. Jumps overboard.

I alone am left. I inch my way back to shore. Immediately get off jet ski.

when rumors are true

It's 8:45 pm. I'm flopped out on the bed in the hotel room, reading the current copy of Newsweek that we picked up at a magazine stand. Emma is asleep in her blow-up dora bed to my right, and samantha is across the room, peacefully sleeping in her little samsonite travel tent. Josh is out with our friend Kevin, catching up on all the things that have happened since we last saw him.

With quiet urgency, the hotel door opens. Josh asks me if I am presentable. What does that mean, I wonder. Presentable, as in there are guests at the door wanting to come in and chat, or presentable, as in I'm not naked in front of the door and it's ok to come in?

His face was lit up with excitement. "Downstairs, Rach. Go downstairs! I've saved you a seat on the front row!"

I guess I better back up a bit. A few weeks before we went to Thailand, our friend told us she had heard a rumor. Rumor was, that while we were in Thailand, Shane & Shane were going to be there, too! [Note: Shane & Shane is two guys, both named Shane :), who are Christian recording artists.] I wanted to believe it, in my heart of hearts, but couldn't bring myself to belive in case it wasn't true. The disappointment would have been too much to bear! But shortly after we arrived, we discovered...it's true! They willingly came to be a part of our time in Thailand, occasionally doing worship for the large group, and having a free concert one night too!

So, back to the story. This particular night, when josh and kevin were walking through the hotel, they saw two guys fiddling around on guitars in the atrium. They both thought, hmmm, these guys are pretty good, let's go listen. The closer they got, they realized who it was. They were one of the first people to notice them and pull up chairs, hence the front row seat. That turned into an impromptu concert - nothing fancy, a little makeshift stage and a 20-story tall atruim with which to fill their sounds.

Josh sat for a while and then had the thoughtfulness to run up to the room and switch places with his wife, who was living blindly in ignorance with her Newsweek. After hearing his great news, I threw on some sweats and flipflops and ran down to the elevators, where I could hear the melody of one of my favorite songs echoing off the walls. I got down in time to hear a bunch of my favorite songs and several new ones too!

One truly funny moment during that little gathering happened right in the middle of a more somber, reflective-type song. It was almost like there was a little bit of reverence in the air, not exactly reverence for them, but it felt like no one really wanted to move, or say anything, or do anything that might throw things off and make them quit playing. Except for...the little thai waitress that worked in that part of the lounge. The entire staff had been busily at work, oblivous to the unknown american playing the guitar. But then, out of nowhere, this one waitress bowed her head low like the thais always do, crossed in front of the stage and gave Shane E. a little peice of paper. She gave her little thai "wai" (see bangkok pics post for more info) and then scurried off. Shane E. looked at the paper, with sort of a puzzled look on his face, then as realization came, you could see it all over his face. He looked over at the desk where the waitstaff had gone back about their business, and gave them a big thumbs up.

When the song was over, Shane B. asked Shane E. what that was all about. They had some "dialogue", you know the kind where the move the microphone so that know one else can hear exactly what they are saying? And then, Shane B. said, " If I knew 'Hotel California', I would SO play it right now!"

Sorry to say, they didn't know hotel california. :)

I felt particularly thankful that the guys decided to come out and share their music with us. From my understanding, it was totally their initiave and their idea. Of course, I wish they would have done the worship every day (though I felt so blessed by those who came to serve in that part), but we really enjoyed the concert they gave. It felt a little awkward trying to get a picture of them; you know, they were here to serve, they were leading us in worship...it just felt a little strange pushing my way up to the front and then blinding them with my flash just so I could get a good picture as proof that I saw them. So, I just took one quick picture from my seat (which, at the official concert was kind of far away) and called that that.

I was just glad that this time, the rumors were true!

bangkok pictures, or a post full of emma

Well, I intended this post to have most of our pictures from bangkok, but as it turns out, it's mostly just a showcase for Emma. Hmm....sorry about that.

And since I've already blathered on and on about how I love bangkok and everything, I can spare you those details in this blog and just summarize the pictures I'm posting. Though, I will say that I left out one very critical detail of my indulging in creature comforts whilst in the world's most polluted city: I bought the newest book in the Shopaholic series...AND a second book by the same author. Fun, truly fun, self-indulgent times! I'm sorry to say that the shopaholic books have absolutely no value in them at all except that they sometimes provide that much-needed respite from my humdrum life. The main character finds herself in several morally compromising situations that certainly go against everything I believe; most of the humor of the book is derived from her extreme superficiality and lack of depth. So if you are looking for encouraging, uplifting, make-you-a-better-person-type books, then don't look to me for advice. But if you want to give in and indulge in something that add nothing to your life except a few (or maybe a lot...) extra laughs, then you should try them out.

Moving right along...this picture is actually not from bangkok. It's from valentine's day when our family went out to an american cafe for ribs. Last year on valentine's day, josh, emma and I ALL went to hideaway pizza together (though our young family looked a little out of place with all the smoochy couples), so we decided to make it two years in a row! And obviously, we were stuck in the same room with our kids, so it's not like we were going to be able to ditch them for the night or anything! Anyway, this picture is included in my bangkok section because it didn't really fit in any of the upcoming posts i have planned, and it's a cute family picture. Incidentally, it is one of the few times in the last year that I have worn a dress. And I might add, it's amazing how a cute dress can make you forget that you usually have spit-up or leftovoer carrots on your clothes and you usually don't make it in the shower too often during the week. Cheers to cute dresses! :) Many of you may remember one of my favorite pictures of emma right after she was born; I think here she was like ten days old or something...But here...she's like...TWO!

Watching the fountains at one of the beautiful new shopping plazas. ("malls" is too casual of a word for these gigantic places...)

Getting filled up for a long night of shopping...a bloomin onion goes a long way!First stop: the brand new Bangkok Toys R US! We had planned to visit and pick up emma and mantha some fun toys. Among the final-cut items that made it back home were: a lovely purple sequined dress and high heels for dressing up, 5 bottles of finger paints, and a slide! Emma had a slide that she used during our 8 months in the states and she loved it...so when we found a similar slide at a good price, we decided samantha would have fun with it too. So we bought the huge thing, and somehow managed to pack it in a big sack and get it back home. Crazy stuff. Here, emma is doing the traditional thai greeting, called "wai", which is folding your hands together and bowing. You can see that Geoffrey is also "wai-ing" to all the customers. Like a kid in a candy store...And on the way home, we piled into a traditional thai tuk-tuk and I embarrassed my husband by asking the driver to take our picture. The slide is tethered on to the back of the tuk tuk with a bungee cord. Maybe the miracle is that it didn't fall off in crazy bangkok traffic!

our first stop...

Our first stop in Thailand was Phuket, where we shared a private villa with two other families. It was a really great situation - we had a private pool, a housekeeper, and someone to make any meals we wanted her to make. Breakfast was provided each day (and chocolate croissants, my personal favorite, were on the menu!) In the evening, we could put the girls to bed and then all the adults go back to the pool and chat, or play games, or whatever. Here are some pictures and brief stories from that part of the trip:

This is May, the housekeeper and chef at the villa; the other lady who helped out is there in the background in the white shirt. Our girls both really enjoyed the asian faces, since they are usually more accustomed to that than white faces!
In addition to the great breakfasts, we sometimes had May cook thai food for us. You can see that dinners were truly abundant! Fresh linens accompanied the great dishes; this night, I think we had fish, spring rolls, pad thai, and some kind of chicken curry. It was SO nice not to have to think about eating - not even where to go or what to eat. They took care of it all, and would even go grocery shopping for us!Even though we were hanging out with other families, we tried to make sure that the girls got thier usual amount of mommy&daddy time! We could tell after a few days, emma was ready for our undivided attention! :) Thanks to the grandparents who sent super-cute summer clothes. Both of our gals were SO cute!

here is the private pool on the deck of the villa. I know this picture of emma isn't great, but she still looks cute in her hat! Over on the side, there was also a children's pool that was the perfect size for emma and clara anne! There were also toys for building sand castles that the girls enjoyed playing with in the pool. Emma would use the shovels and pails and create almost like a makeshift kitchen (you know, because she WAS having kitchen withdrawals, unlike her mama!) and "make" us all special dishes, like beans and corn. I know, beans and corn...sounds great huh? Emma's friend clara could do really great swimming with her floaties on, but emma preferred to be held anytime she was in the big pool. But she still loved it all, so that is fun! You can see the ocean right at the back of the picture; our villa was about a mile from the beach.
On this vacation, we learned something about mantha - the heat made her eczema worse, as did chlorine or salt. So....that meant our fabulous beach vacation had to be altered a bit to accomodate mantha's skin! The deck of the pool had a nice shady area where she could sit and play, so we'd let her play there or just keep her inside while one of us took turns dipping in the pool or playing with emma. And truly, even though we had to adjust a lot of our plans, I really enjoyed the extra time spending with her. She seemed not to mind that everyone else could be in the pool - she seemed happy enough! here, she is smiling with chloe...
And here she is, in the cool of the morning, lounging on one of the deck chairs. What a cute girl!

beach bums

On our second to last day of vacation, we finally figured out how to optimize our time. Just too bad that it took that long to get it all figured out! We wanted to go to the beach, we wanted the girls to go to the beach...but with the heat influencing mantha's skin the way it did and also trying to work things so that the kiddos can get thier naps (not a happy time for anyone if they don't) we hadn't had any days as a family at the beach at all!

Then we hit vacation gold. We woke up early, ate breakfast early and headed to the beach. The beach we went to was perfect - shaded on the east by trees, ensuring extra minutes in the shade. Palm trees gently swayed against the backdrop of imposing limestone mountains on either side of the beach. The tourists were still sleepy in bed, either hung over from hard partying (too common here in thailand) or enjoying their vacation by sleeping in. The gentle surf came and went, each surge whispering relaxation and enjoyment. Yards and yards of lounge chairs sat out on the beach sat unopened, their shady umbrellas unwilling to give their shade at such an early hour.

So there we were, with prime beach all to ourselves (minus the occasional jogger or retired couple). It is true, right, that the early bird gets the worm? For two days in a row, until the morning of our departure, we hit the beach early and stayed until crankiness forced us to leave.


Self Portait, taken by Mr. Eggroll: Mantha enjoyed fishing her hands through the sand and then relishing every grain as it passed through her fingers. I agree with my sis kate that she is pretty cute! And in the shade, she was happy and delightful!

It's true, hundreds of yards of beach chairs still waiting for the day to begin...and there's mantha, just in the middle of it all.

Early morning family portrait, taken by the local dude who takes the money for the lounge chairs (no, they're not free...) barefoot in the sand...fun times...
Daddy and Emma looking for sand dollars. Total count: 8, plus one pretty seashell.

Emma loved playing in the sand making sand castles, or whatever it was exactly that she was making. The quote of the day comes from a british lady who had been watching her from down the beach for 15 or 20 minutes. She finally came up to emma and josh and said (so imagine it with the cool british accent): "I've been watching your daughter for ages and I think she's absolutely charming! She's playing so well by herself and I just feel absolutely charmed by her!"

home, sweet home

On our last night at the hotel in thailand, Emma was watching us - a little apprehensively - as we scurried around trying to pack our stuff for our 4:30AM (yes, that's AM!) departure. I think she had figured out what was going on: she found herself a little plastic grocery sack, grabbed a bottle of water, put it in, added a bag of chips, samantha's pacifier, and her favorite book. She put on her cute little pink beach hat, walked over to the door and announced: "Ok! Let's go home!"

And so we did. We somehow managed to pack all of my purchases into our two suitcases (did I mention that our total luggage was 86 kilos? That's 25 kilos (or over 50 lbs) over airline luggage allowances!) We actually woke up when the wake-up call came and made it on the flight. An entire day of transit later, we made it home.

Home. Home! Home is where Mantha sleeps through the night. Home is where Emma remembers how to use the potty. Home is where you don't worry what the other guests think of your crying children. Home is where the girls go to bed at 7:30. Home is where routine comes back; fun times are remembered and relived, but routine gets re-established. Home is, after all, where we live.

Traveling is fun, such glorious fun. But nothing is more comforting than walking through the door to where your life is.

For emma and mantha, that's pretty easy. Home is the walls of the familiar pack-and-play, or the comfy, pink bed. Home is where all the favorite toys have been awaiting our return. Home is familiar sights (cockroaches) and sounds (traffic noise).

For josh and I, it's a little more complex. We both commented how we weren't quite sure how to anticipate "coming home". Where we currently live feels the most like home than anywhere we have lived in a while, but there are such strong associations with "coming home" that it still didn't feel completely right. I remember as a teenager going on youth trips and stuff, and the thought of "home" at the end of 10 days brought such calm to my heart. The same room, the same stuff, the same place that I had lived in almost my entire childhood. Home was always the same, until we got married.

In our (almost) seven years of marraige, we've lived six different places, not counting numerous month-long stints in hotels and other such places. In all of those places, we have designated a few items that will always come with us. So home has come to mean where our wedding clock, the wooden fruits and the thai silk are.

But as we unpacked our stuff last night, we both felt more and more at home. This is certainly the place our girls feel comfortable, and is a place we have come to love. (Though we both thought our house seemed smaller than when we left...)

The girls have had a fun day exploring their new toys getting back into routine, and remembering where all the boundaries are (ie, samantha thinks that for the rest of her life, whenever she cries, mommy will immediately pick her back up; emma thinks she can disobey to her heart's content because we let it slide so many times on vacation!). As we speak, our house helper is mopping and cleaning the film of dust and dirt that has already accumulated on every surface in the house. The suitcases are unpacked, the yummy imported items already carefully arranged in the kitchen. The house is being restored to order. Josh is already meeting with someone this afternoon, I still have not taken a shower. Yep, it's true: we're home.

packing light

as we surveyed all our millions of peices of luggage we needed to take on this trip, we were a bit overwhelmed at our attempt to "pack light". So, trying to reduce the weight on our shoulders, we made the difficult decision to leave the computer at home. This is the reason I have not responded to any emails recently, should you have sent us any. Thank the Lord for blogger! :)

Anyway, I just wanted to post a quick note and tell you that all is well here; the girls are doing good, josh and I have been good. No one is sick or had any other travel-related disasters! And...if I can tempt you to wait a bit longer, I've got loads of pictures on my camera that are just waiting, begging, to be posted to my blog. AND...I've got loads of great stories and great news to post as soon as we get back home.

We've had a great time in thailand, have had a few AMAZING surprises (not pregancy-type surprises, so don't jump ahead!) but are looking forward to resuming "life as normal", whatever that means!

we heart Bangkok

We just finished our two days in bangkok, and I feel strangely rejuvenated.

Bangkok, ah, bangkok. It's a city that exudes life through all its stench-filled alleys and glittering designer shops. It's almost like you can feel pent-up energy pulsing through the cars waiting nervously at crowded intersections. Trendy twenty-somethings walk through gleaming shopping centers that cover huge areas of real estate. It's a city like no other.

I haven't always loved Bangkok. When we lived there waiting for emma's birth, I loathed the place. I was pregnant, and living in one of the most hot and humid climates in the world was not such a great match. Street vendors hawking their fresh foods made my stomach churn; now the smell of it leaves me with a sense of appreciation for the colorful diversity that makes up such an interesting city.

Previously in Bangkok, I hated walking. We walked everywhere, past street markets, past mom-and-pop stores, past "massage" parlors offering the male gender every possible service except a real massage. I still hate walking in bangkok - a city that is unimaginably stroller un-friendly, but I enjoyed the scenery much more this time around. I loved watching the convergence of cultures that is on display at each and every point around the city: moronic foreign tourists, middle-easterners, africans, asians, business people...it's an amazing picture of the many places people come from.

We indulged in many creature comforts during our brief, but busy time in Bangkok. First and most important on the list was dinner at Outback, where we ordered a bloomin onion AND desserts...yikes! Then we had breakfast at my favorite bakery in the entire world and had chocolate croissants and blueberry muffins. We had lunch at my most favorite restaurant in the entire world - called the Food Loft - and I secretly wished I could have eaten there for the next five weeks. Every day. Every meal. That's how much I love it. And...funnily enough, my parents -who know nothing about Asia - were the ones who found the restaurant and introduced us to it during our three months in bangkok. Anyway, I could talk about Food Loft all day, but since I have made my point, I will move on to dinner. After we spent about $250 on Western imported products, we had dinner at the Lebanese restaurant that we frequented during emma's birth, and found to our great surprise that Emma loved eating hummus and pita bread. Go figure!

So while I could never live in Bangkok, I love love LOVE to visit the place. Even the skies were clear and pollution free for us today. And, most of all, Bangkok is the place that brought into our lives perhaps the sweetest, and most life-changing experience of all: Emma Brighton, who turns two this week.

Happy Birthday, sweet Emma.

news from thailand...

so after seven days of no blogging, I post only crumbs for you...I am sorry! :)

The last few days have been fun ones, lazily passed at the pool or at the beach, feasting on fresh fish caught in the bay or, like tonight, going out for baby back ribs. We leave in the morning to head to another location to meet up with other friends. Perhaps from there I will have more time to blog - of the seven free hours of internet that came with our place, I finally got a piece of the action with 5 minutes and three seconds left!

Tomorrow we head to bangkok for samantha to meet with a pediatric allergist...more to come later!

Toddler Property Laws

Is this true or what?!

Toddler Property Laws
1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my hand, it's mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
6. If I'm doing or building something, all the pieces are mine.
7. If it looks just like mine, it is mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If it's broken, it's yours!

things to be proud of...

There's a lot of prideful people around our house! :) just kidding...

But, here are a few things we have been proud of recently:

- the much requested picture of our table. I found that no matter which angle I try to photograph it from, it never looks quite like my pottery barn catalogue page, but I guess that's why I'm not a photographer! Anyway, we have been pleased with it so far. It does seem to be a little chameleon-like, in that usually it looks black unless the sunshine spills in the room via our living room windows, and then it looks nice and yummy chocolatey brown. Any of you are welcome to join us for dinner and try it out sometime (offer does not include airfare :)

- it appears that my little samantha (who at this exact moment is trying to convince herself and me that she does not need to take a nap) is quite the little (as katie would say) sneaky McSneakster! She's been pulling fast ones on us all week, but the most notable one is that several days ago I left her in Emma's bed to play. Emma's bed is nice and bouncy, and has a very expensive guardrail so she was surrounded in safety. But...when I went to go retrieve my baby bundle a few moments later, she was not happily playing with stuffed animals...she was STANDING up on emma's bed! Holy Moly! then, yesterday morning, this was the scene I walked into after leaving her to play books...

- Emma has had some good days of poo to be proud about, so just to make her feel good about herself, I'm posting a picture of her poo chart. She absolutely adores putting stickers on her paper every time she uses her potty...sometimes, she will even stop a little prematurely so she can go again just a few minutes later to double her stickers! What a crazy girl!

- last night, I finally finished the labor of love I have been working on for my eldest child...her second year video! It's a tradition I started last year, and who knows how long I'll be able to keep it up, but finally it is finished! It actually didnt' take me a terribly long time, but it sure seemed that way to josh! I tried explaining to him that normal people can work on projects in large chunks of time. Mothers, however, have brief windows of time during the day, so a 30-hour project could very likely take me 30 days to complete. Anyway, the point is, that all of our happy memories from last year are forever recorded, and now my evenings are free to go back to my happy world of Apple Pie Spice bubble baths and Bejeweled! Special thanks (even though it was duly noted on the video itself) go to: Paul, for the use of his vast music files, and Alicia O who patiently taught me how to preserve such great memories. Thanks!

In other package news, I know you are all waiting on pins and needles to discover if our packages are going to make it in time before we head for warmer weather. It's almost like how you feel the entire week leading up to the Survivor finale or something like that. But as of today, we are still sans 4 boxes...but we're holding out hope of a speedy arrival! T minus four days and counting...

We aren't taking our computer on vacation, but I think I'll still have a few opportunities to blog between now and when we return here on Feb. 28. Plus, my gals have cute swimsuits, so I'll have to share some beach pictures with you all!

going to kindergarten

It goes without saying that though Josh and I can get by in asianese, we do not speak it fluently (though josh IS trying hard to change that!). When we think about Emma and mantha growing up here, we know that they will likely speak it fluently, but right now that is not the case. Not only is that frustrating (like, when we go outside, they can't tell people to quit rubbing their hair or they don't want to hold hands) but it also prevents them, to some degree, from making local friends.

We've started thinking about letting emma go to a kindergarten one or two mornings a week for several reasons: 1) to get out of the house, 2) to have more opportunities to speak and hear asianese, 3) to make some new little friends, and 4) to give mom a break (but that one is a very distant fourth place... :)

We found a friend that owned a christian kindergarten, so we were definetly willing to check it out and see what things are like. First of all, it's not exactly kindergarten. It's more like glorified, structured daycare. Since in this country, stay-at-home mom's are nearly impossible to find, these "kindergartens" are a dime a dozen.

Off we were this morning, battling the fierce mountain wind that greets us the moment we step outside our door. We took a taxi to a part of town I have never been before. The "kindergarten" was located in a nice apartment complex full of landscaped gardens and sits right in the shadow of the southern mountains in our city. As soon as we rang the bell, we were greeted by a crowd of frenetic two-year olds, happily screaming greetings to us as we removed our layers of winter clothing. Emma stood there, unsure if she was supposed to overwhelmed or if she should immediatley join the excitement herself.

She warmed up much faster than i thought. Maybe it's partially because there are usually so few people that are her size. Even when we go to playgrounds, most of the kids are much older and more physically capable than she is. So, here she was, surrounded by twenty pairs of eyes that were right at her level. Even though she had no idea what was going on unless we would translate, she did a great job.

Even though I was happy to see her making friends, I was really surprised at how sad I felt. It seemed like I was watching her grow up right before my eyes. For the first time in her life, when she was unsure of what to do, she looked to others. Her eyes darted for the cute little girl in the blue sweater, who took emma under her wing. She looked at the teacher so she could imitate what she was doing. She followed the lead of the other kids. The whole time, I watched from the sidelines, aware that this was just the first of many times I would have to let her go and let others help her. Not even one time did she need me this morning. I didn't realize how hard growing up was - for her and for me!

All in all, it was a great morning. Emma got to play on the slides, walk around with the other kids, got to sing asianese songs, play with balls, and play finger games. I think when we come back from thailand, we are thinking about letting her go one or two mornings a week to play. See if you can spot her in the pictures, haha!

samantha had a good time too! She really enjoyed watching the kids bounce around and play. Though she gave emma a run for her money in the "garnering attention" category! All the little kids were fascinated with the little foreign baby, and luckily, today samantha was more than happy to oblige with happy smiles and sweet giggles.

With girls like this, who needs anything else?

we all wear many hats...

it's true. We all have lots of responsibilities, causing us to wear lots of different hats. But, my dear emma has taken that saying just a bit too far. You see, recently, she has discovered that inside her closet, there is a drawer full of winter and summer hats. She can spend hours filtering through the drawer, picking out hats, trying them on, putting them back, passing them out to different people in the house for them to wear, giving them to mantha, putting them on dora...truly, this occupies a significant portion of her day.

My sister, katie, commented a few days ago how my children were destined to follow in thier aunt's footsteps and become a diva, and I think she may have prophesied correctly! Emma loves clothes, hats, anything new! Yesterday, we were going through our bags of new clothes to take to Thailand, and she excitedly picked up every peice of clothing. Each peice had its own comment:

"ooooh!"

"wow, momma!"

"so pretty...flowers on it..."

"aaaah!"

"nice!"

It was quite a funny little show. Then, after looking through the stack - TWICE - she decided she wanted to try them on. She looked at me, and said "Emma wear it." So we put on a pink flowerdy dress. She then said, "Take a picture!" So we had a mini-fashion show while she tried on a new polka-dot swimsuit (though not a polka-dot bikini!), dresses, dora pants, cute skirts...she'll be styling when we hit the beach!

Here are some pictures of my hat diva:

do you believe in miracles?

well, I'm starting to!

So this week, not ALL of our five packages came, but one of them made it here yesterday morning! I was so excited to see the delivery man at the door - and just before opening it, made some sarcastic remark to no one in particular about how it was probably of our packages! Woo hoo!!!

Emma and Mantha got tons of cute new clothes, josh got his shorts, and I got some fun scrapbooking stuff. One down, four to go...!

The other major miracle since my last post (which feels like ages ago) is that our internet is up and working at its normal rate now! Of course, now the normal speed feels strangely like a car spinning out of control because it is so mind-bogglingly fast, but we're not complaining! So I guess now I have no excuse to be so lazy on my posts.

Samantha had a great day with her skin yesterday - I actually thought she was healed when I went to get her out of bed. Her face was totally clear, her arms and chest were too. Then, I changed her diaper and saw that she still had some redness and bumps on her legs and stuff, but yesterday was a great day! I waited all day to try to get a family picture since she was looking so beautiful, but it never seemed to happen.

We're hoping when we go to thailand on vacation next week - yeah, that's right! Vacation....NEXT WEEK!! - that the humidity and warm air will help her skin! We are so excited about our upcoming trip and hanging out at the pool, the beach, and Outback Steakhouse!

There's lots more to write, but I sense in my spirit that the precious naptime moments are quickly passing through the hourglass...so I shall leave you with a few cute pics of my gals!

a week of miracles - warning!! long post!!

So I don’t necessarily want to call this a week of miracles, because putting some of the things that have happened this week on the same plane as oh, say, being healed or raised from the dead seems a little frivolous. But, nonetheless, there have been some unusual happenings this week that are worth mention…

For starters, on Sunday morning – bright and early – my new table came! YAY! It was truly worth the wait and now it sits in all of its bigness in my dining room. It actually sort of dwarfs the room, but hey, if you ever want to have a big gathering, my house is now the place to be. And, if we have four other children, everyone can be comfortably seated without much ado, like bringing in the old card table, folding chairs, or someone sitting on the piano bench. Now, putting down all that cash was a little more difficult to accept…but I’m glad we waited to get what we wanted and didn’t settle for some random piece of cheap furniture. How we will get it back to the States should we ever resettle in America is certainly another issue since each chair weights about as much as I do, but we’ve got a table for the ages now!

Today was another accident free day for Emma – woo hoo, emmy! If I can recant my opening statement, I think that deserves to be on a plane at least close to some of those biblical miracles!

But here is the find of the century for all of us Asia-dwellers…

Somehow, in some conversation somewhere about something, something about avacadoes was mentioned in the presence of our ever-resourceful, snake-fat-oil-suggesting house helper. So she takes it upon herself to check out some of the wholesale bakers markets in town…and reports back to us with the word that, if we wanted, we could buy avacadoes here in our town.

The thought that this is possible was truly baffling to us, because though there are many imported items you can get here in our asialand, avocadoes is always top on every expat’s “things-I-miss-most-about-home” list. The name doesn’t even translate well into the local language, most people have never heard of one, much less seen one or tasted one.

So she pops in one day and tells us the good news that we can buy avocadoes, but then the bad news: we have to buy them in bulk. Bulk here means in boxes of 30 or 36. Wowza (to take rachel w’s word…)! That’s a lot of green stuff! But we agreed to it anyway, and today, just as promised, a box of 30 avocadoes was delivered to our home. Those nice and bumpy skins just waiting to be cut open and destroyed by tortilla chips…

Tonight we feasted on taco salads with refried beans, sour cream, guacamole, cheddar cheese (another hard find), Tostitos, and topped off with chocolate covered strawberries. The other good news is that we have like, 25 avocadoes left, still sitting in the kitchen!

So, in keeping with my miracle week, I am hoping beyond hope that some packages we are waiting on will come. Now a quick word about packages – packages are truly a lifeline to home. It’s where friends and family send you lots of little goodies that make life easier and more fattening when you are away from the obese land of the USA. Chocolate chips, cute baby clothes, Christmas presents, good quality anything…packages are so fun to get and even more fun to open. They bring warm fuzzies and remind you that people back home love you and remember you and take the time to pick stuff out just for you and then take even more time to make sure you get it. The good feeling lasts for days, and sometimes even weeks if you can wisely ration your goods. But, Mr. Postman has been playing a cruel joke on us and we are still waiting on FIVE – yes, count them, FIVE – packages that should have already been here weeks, even months ago.

It is agonizing to me every time I think of it – the contents of some packages were Christmas presents that have been much anticipated…hmmmm, I think a new pampered chef garlic press, some scrapbooking stuff, new clothes for josh to wear on our upcoming vacation in Thailand, and who knows what else? That’s the fun of packages – you don’t know what’s inside! Anyway, along with those packages are three boxes of books we had shipped over here.

Books, sure, are replaceable. I even made a list of the contents of each box so that I would know if something was lost or opened. But there are a few irreplaceable items in those boxes – my Bible, given to me as my wedding present from my husband, which I have used my entire married life. (I foolishly thought it just a little too heavy to pack in our luggage and decided instead to ship it.) It contains many notes and personal reflections since 2000, including the beginning of my life overseas, the passing of my grandfather, the birth of my two children, and many other impacting, but less significant events. Its contents can never be replaced or replicated. If it is lost, I shall truly be crushed.

Another important item in one of those boxes lost in post office abyss is Samantha’s baby book – which contains the only ultrasound pictures we have while she was her cute little self in utero, exact details and personal thoughts of her birth, and her “just born” hand and footprints that were taken at the hospital that happy day of June 17th. I sigh and my spirit falls every time I think about it.

But, I’m starting to drive my husband crazy, because I got this crazy idea on Sunday when our table came. I decided that this was my week of miracles and that this would be the week that our five boxes came. Every time the doorbell rings, I jump and scurry to the door. My poor husband probably feels rejected every time he comes home, because he knows I’m hoping it’s the delivery man! When we walk into our apartment building, I try to throw a casual glance toward our mailbox, hoping to see a notification slip that we have a package waiting for us. I give expectant looks to the apartment manager people who sit mindlessly at the little desk by the wall of mailboxes.

But now it is almost Friday morning, and my miracles haven’t come yet. There’s probably some wife of an asian FedEx guy who is happily using MY garlic press to press HER garlic! I guess since I said “my week of miracles” I (or God, or FedEx or EMS or someone) still has until Sunday, but…

mama eggroll made it online!

What follows is perhaps my most random post ever, full of all the thoughts I’ve wanted to blog about over the last several days but have been prevented from posting due to the thorn in our flesh, the broken underwater fiber-optic cable:

What a great life it must be to know that Dora the Explorer and chocolate can solve all your problems! Not that I have ever underestimated the powers of chocolate, but still…

Today was Emma’s first accident-free day! Yeah, I know…it was December 27th when we started the whole potty training ordeal. There were many days that almost won the title of “first accident-free day”, but then something would happen – either an early mistake when she first woke up, or being too careless late at night. Oh well, it finally happened today! AND, I might add (to brag on my daughter a bit) today was accident-free even through 1)going to clara’s house for most of the morning and early afternoon (meaning TWO taxi rides where she set me in a panic by announcing with a dead-pan look on her face “poopoo mama!”) 2) wearing her cute little panties even at naptime and staying dry and 3) spending most of the evening running errands with us and going potty at her first public restroom (in the States, even public restrooms are not so clean. You can just imagine the situation over here…) SO, props to emma, huh? She did great today.

The thing is, we’ve been luring her by the promise of adding a Dora sticker to a little piece of paper that is taped above her potty chair whenever she goes poopoo on her potty, and of course, a small piece of chocolate. Amazingly enough, after she would poopoo, she would be so distracted by the thrill of putting the sticker on the paper, she forgot about the chocolate!!! So, thank you dora, for being such a good inspiration to my sweet girl.

Speaking of Dora, josh recently has been making up bedtime stories for emma, which she totally loves. She will lay mesmerized in his arms while she listens to him spin a story that would impress anyone. One important part of the story is personalizing all the characters. Josh will ask emma, “who should mommy be? Who should daddy be?” The usual characters shake out as follows (if you are not up on your Dora trivia, tune into Nick Jr. if you want to be a friend of Emma’s!): EmmaDora (pronounced as one word, not divided), DaddyBoots, MommaTico (how I was chosen by her little mind as Tico I will never understand) and ManthaIsa.

So as josh’s tales get taller and taller, I just listen with amusement while I watch them bond. So a few nights ago, Josh was telling a story about how mommatico was driving through the forest, picking up all her friends, including of course, emmadora, daddyboots, and manthaisa. An interesting thought hit me as I pictured Tico the squirrel driving through the forest: he is the only character on the Dora show that speaks no English (the rest of the are bilingual, you know) yet, he is the only character on the show who has a drivers license. Where’s the logic in that???

Emma lately has been quite the bucket of laughs. It seems like everything that comes from her mouth is so innocently funny and cute (except, of course, her impetuous “NO’s!”) Here are two of the funnies we’ve had around here:
-I was admiring emma one evening as she was reading a book. Her hair was messy (as usual) but something about the way it fell on her face that night, the way her little eyes twinkled all full of toddler excitement, and the precious curves on her face just melted my heart. So I said, “Emma, wow, you are such a pretty girl! Momma loves you!” She smiled with innocent pride. Then I said, “Emma, we can thank God for everything – we can even thank God for your beauty! You can say, ‘Thank you God for my beauty!’” So, in obedient fashion, Emma replies, “Thank you God for my booty!” What’s not to love about that?! J


Samantha has decided that she will not give up the limelight easily to her big sister! She is getting to be a big girl in her own right! Recently, I’ve stood her up next to this activity table that she loves, and I’ll surround her with pillows on all sides in case her leanings take her a bit too far. The girl can stand up by herself for 10 or 15 minutes! Holy moly, where did that come from?! This ability has been the delight of her days recently, and has freed up my arms quite a bit to actually get some stuff done!

I’m sorry to say, though, that her eczema is not doing so great – it’s particulary itchy on her head because in the morning when I go to get her, she has red scratches and bloody areas on the back of her head where she has cut herself from scratching! Yuck! So we are trying yet another strange form of asian herbal remedies…actually, I’m not sure if its herbal or medicinal, or what. It smells weird, but they all assure me that its safe and stuff. I just want her to be more comfy! So we’ll see how that all works out.

Well, there you have it for now. Tomorrow night is game night with a few other foreign couples in town. Hopefully, the kiddos will go to bed early and we can stay up late and catchphrase or scrabble or quiddler to our hearts’ content…

hanging in there

For whatever reason, my internet connection is flying like a space-age jet, so I will take advantage of it and post!

I want to say thanks to you guys for your encouraging words and thoughtful responses to my crisis of motherhood a few days ago. The last few days truly have been better, for lots of reasons. First, I think, is that (at least a few of the days) I got up a little earlier than the girls and took a few moments to quiet my heart before Him and prepare for the day. Even just a few moments seemed to change my attitude for the day and influence events from there. Truly, that we have the ability to come before an amazing God who not only loves us, but has the power to change us should never be taken for granted.

Another more sobering reason is that a few days ago, through a friend of a friend, I became aware of a family in colorado who, on Friday (usa time) had to make the heart-wrenching decision to take their 7-month-old child off of life support. He had been critically ill for many months; the best efforts of doctors only left them more confused to his ailment. But, the testimony of the family and their trust in the Lord during such emotional agony is utterly amazing. As I read their blog over and over again, hot tears spilling over my cheeks (while emma obliviously watched Dora save the soccer game), I realized how easy to take the days for granted. It gave me the extra motivation I needed to remember that I ought to "give thanks for everything", including the opportunities to help my children become more christ-like!

In other, more random bits-and-peices from our life, Emma can recite huge chunks of songs, poems and books that she has consistent contact with. Since her powers of memory have been on such great display, we decided last week that we'd try to help her start memorizing things that can truly benefit her (not that there's anything WRONG with saying quatro, cinco, seis, or reciting every page of "I'm a big sister" - the long-standing favorite on the bookshelf). So we started last week with Genesis 1:1, which she knows when prompted. Then, thursday, we learned part of Acts 5:29 - We must obey God. She really remembers it and can say it! Of course, we think she's brilliant-child!

Samantha is making quick work of becoming mobile. Yesterday, she transported herself about three feet (though I hesistate to call it crawling just yet because it still looked...well, a little strange. But she got from pointA to pointB, and isn't that really the point?) She can stand alone for a while on her own, and is quite happy with her newfound abilities. We bought a huge blanket to put on the floor of the living room so she has a safer, and more public place to play (she didn't like being sequestered on the corner of the couch). I've been a little sad at how fast she has seemed to grow up! Can't she just make it stop...?

anyway, thanks again for all your prayers and comments. More from us when the internet works...

Motherhood is not for wimps

After almost two hours, I finally pulled myself away from my steaming bath where I mindlessly played Bejeweled on Josh’s ipod. (yeah, apparently that super-addictive game that comes on cell-phones can be purchased for your ipod, too! And my husband, who knew I spent some of my early labor with Samantha playing it, decided to buy it for me as a new year’s present. Hmm…that five dollars just might ruin all my free time…yikes!)

Anyway, my blog is sort of on life-support now. Not because I am tired of blogging – no, on the contrary! It’s still that stupid underwater cable that slows down our internet. I could mail a letter individually to all my readers faster than I will be able to post this blog. Nevertheless, that is not the point of my post.

The point of this blog (as you can tell from the title) is that my motherhood abilities lately have been stretched. The way I see it, one of these two factors is the issue: (a) I have TWO children or, (b) I have one child who is two years old. When emma was samantha’s age, life was happy, fun, and do-able. There was little I needed to do for her except feed, change, and love her. Kisses and focused attention were cures for anything.

Oh, but now that Emma is a two-year-old, there’s more to the package than just meeting physical needs. There are other parts of her little self that are maturing – her spirit, her will, her soul. Those aspects have required much more of me than I thought. It’s true – when the battle is just against “flesh and blood”, solutions come easy. But now the battle is against “spiritual forces”, that ingrained nature that wills against everything that her conscience prods her to do.

And I am her mother – I have the God-given job of tear-wiper, nose-cleaner, boo-boo-kisser. I also have been entrusted by God to help guide her on a path towards righteousness, to point her towards God Himself.

But how can I do that when I rely on my own power? Sure, no one would outright say that they live their life in their own power – but my actions are screaming what my words would never be bold enough to say. My actions say that I’m too busy changing diapers, getting lunch ready and cleaning dirty toddler panties to really spend much time with Him. My actions are saying that since my children have an insane tendency to wake up with the roosters that I get a free-pass for not being diligent to rise before them. My actions say, “Sorry, Lord…I’ll try to handle today on my own.”

And recently my world has come crashing down. Nothing drastic, nothing terrible. Just the constant grind of daily demands that saps my kindness, my gentleness, my godliness. Being the best mother I can be is just not a good standard anymore. There are some days when “the best I can do” is a pretty pathetic display of behavior. Just because that is “the best I can do” does not mean that is how God intended me to parent my children that day.

My call is to be the mother HE wants me to be. That means exhibiting His qualities towards my children. That means that when Emma pees in her panties for the six-billionth time, that I can firmly punish her but can do it without letting my exasperation shame her. That means when Emma chooses to act like a two-year-old, I choose to act like the Lord, NOT like a two-year-old. That means if I spend the entire day holding Samantha, dealing with emma, and keeping the house in quasi-order, I can do it without carrying my “woe is me” attitude around with me. I can do it, as serving the Lord, not serving men.

But it also means that I need to make my time with Him more of a priority. If I have to wake up earlier, so be it. (perhaps I should go to bed earlier instead of posting to my blog at 1130pm…) Most certainly, something has to change. One thing is certain: I’m a pretty decent mom. But pretty decent is not my standard, or His.

Will you pray for me? I truly feel like Emma is at a crucial time in her life – she is learning her boundaries, she is learning right and wrong and the consequences of each. The spiritual foundation she will carry with her all of her life is being laid during these early years. Many days, I feel I am far from adequate for the task. I feel like I respond to her from my own flesh and my own wisdom. I feel exasperated. I feel frustrated. I feel like all my glorious visions of motherhood are swirling wildly down the drain. And yet, I want to respond to her with God’s love, in ways that point her towards the infinite kindness and tenderness of her Heavenly Father. What an overwhelming responsibility!

Please pray that my time with Him will set the tone for each morning; that my relationship with emma will flow from my relationship with my Father. Pray that I can get my lazy duff out of bed in the morning so that I have some moments of solitude before the chaos begins.

Life in a fishbowl

Life in a Fishbowl

Life in asialand has been a little frustrating lately, especially as it relates to anything internet-related (which, let’s just face it, includes a whole lot of stuff). That earthquake that hit after Christmas in Taiw@n damaged a major cable that ran under the pacific ocean, connecting internet users from the asian and north American continents. Even though we do not live in Taiw@n, the damaged cable has affected nearly every Asian country – Japan, Korea, China, Hong Kong, Thailand, Singapore, Indonesia, even some parts of Australia. For the last week, our internet has been largely non-existent. Today was the first day I’ve even been able to pull up blogger since the 27th. So, you have my apologies for my unplanned absence. All that to say, I’ve got lots to blog about, but it will be coming in little chunks, as my husband has less of a capacity to stay up late than I do, and the nighttime hours are my only chance to blog.

So here’s the story the title alluded to…

Here in our city is this place called “Gymboree: play, ,art, and music”. Yeah, the ultra-expensive kids clothing store in the States also apparently has an ultra-expensive educational daycare program for babies and toddlers. It is advertised in this country as a place to get your kids to be exposed to English (as all the activities are supposedly done in English) but the truth is, there are few places like this in this country. Gymboree here does do lots of fun things – like special art and music emphasis, planned activities that encourage thinking, stimulation, and are geared to challenge different age levels. The locals here think it is super cool, and it truly is a neat place, even from me, who hails from the American land of plenty.

Yet, like I said, it is ultra-expensive. Sure, our US dollar goes a long way in the local currency, but I don’t think even WE could afford it. You sign up for a certain amount of sessions that are once a week, 45 minutes a session. So, a two-year commitment (the standard contract) will cost you about $1200! Over a thousand dollars to take your kid once a week to play! Yikes!

We have opted out of the sparkling clean Gymboree play sessions, but were all too happy to accept an invitation to a birthday party for our friend “ding ding” (yes, I’m serious) held there after Christmas. Even though the party started at 7:00pm (just a hare before bedtime for Emma), we showed up and participated in all the fun games. We played the parachute thing where all the adults grab a handle of the parachute and then make it billow up and down, there were games that involved catching bubbles that were being spit out of a bubble blower, and lots of big cushions where the kiddos could bounce and bounce to their hearts content.

Then, after every ounce of energy that could be sapped from the toddlers was gone, they escorted us all down to an open lobby-type area for some small snacks and drinks. Here’s where the story gets interesting. The Gymboree is located inside of a huge supermarket with lots of other stores, similar to a large shopping mall. The outside walls of the Gymboree are all glass and open up to all the foot traffic coming and going from the grocery store. We ourselves have walked passed the Gymboree many times as we have made our weekly grocery shopping trips, and usually throw a quick glance over there to see what might be going on.

But December 27th was different. December 27 had foreigners playing in the Gymboree! So all the foot traffic walking by the Gymboree decided to stop and look and stay and stare. It might take you a moment to figure it all out, but look closely at the picture. You can see that Rachel and I are talking on the couches in the upper left. John is playing with his daughter somewhere in the middle, and Josh snapped the picture. All along the wall you can see the attention that was attracted by the curious mob, wondering what in the world the foreigners would have been doing inside the Gymboree.

It honestly felt like a case of the haves vs. the have-nots – all the people who can’t afford the thousand-dollar investment in their kids English ability looking longingly at the people who have forked out the dough.

It was funny to see this microcosm of what life often feels like for us. It truly feels like we are constantly being watched, observed, scrutinized, criticized, adored, revered…life over here is such a strange feeling. It really is like living in a fishbowl.